Sian. It’s a word that we people in Singapore love to use. Bored? Sian. Tired? Sian. Sick of something? Sian.
While we use this word loosely to mean a whole spectrum of emotions, ranging from what we feel when our boss gives us too much work (what could be more sian than that?) to when life just seems bland and nothing exciting seems to be happening (life is sian, lah), a feeling of ‘sian-ness’ can also sometimes be a red flag for our mental health.
1. Burnout
Sunday nights are the new Monday blues, as many people start feeling sian about going back to work, even the night before the work week begins. While it’s perfectly normal to feel wistful about leaving the weekends behind and having to hustle again, a prolonged feeling of sianness may be very well due to burnout.
Overworking without taking sufficient breaks often leads to mental and emotional effects like lower productivity, a sense of dread thinking about work, irritability, and fatigue. That perpetual tiredness and lack of motivation is aptly encompassed in what we call sian.
If you sense that your sianness is coming from burnout, address the issue by scheduling regular time off work. If possible, talk to your manager or boss to adjust your workload, and practice setting boundaries when you feel like you have too much on your plate.
2. Feeling directionless
Most people aspire to have a stable life – where you have everything you need, you are contented, and nothing happens to rock your boat. But as many can testify, despite having these, life can take on a mundanity where everything just seems to run on clockwork. It begets the question: Is there more to this? Is there more to life?
Feeling stagnant and aimless are keywords here. You seem comfortable, but you are bored. Nothing excites you or challenges you. You are just going through the motions because you have to – sian.
If this sounds like you, be intentional about seeking out adventure and discomfort. Do something you have never done before: learn a new skill, travel, or start your own side project. Find something that makes you excited to get out of bed: whether that is a cause you are passionate about, or setting a new goal for yourself.
3. Emotional numbing
There are times when you feel empty inside but you don’t know how else to describe it to others, except – sian. You don’t seem to feel any emotions, whether positive or negative. Things that you once enjoyed no longer bring you joy. You can’t bring yourself to laugh or cry at the right moments, even though you know those are the appropriate emotional responses. You feel detached and distant, devoid of emotions.
Emotional numbing can occur for various reasons. Things like trauma, grief, and anxiety can trigger a period of numbness. It is as if your mind has depleted its emotional resources after a period of intense emotions. In response to a traumatic event, your mind may shut down your emotions as way for your mind to protect itself from further hurt.
Talk to a counsellor if you feel emotionally numb or detached – especially if it goes on for a long time. A mental health therapist can help you work through why you are experiencing this and recommend management steps for you.
Conclusion
One simple word ‘sian’ can belie so many complex emotions and states of mind. By looking deeper into ourselves and conducting meaningful reflection, we can gain more clarity regarding our own mental health and wellness instead of sweeping things under the rug.
Sometimes, we also need a little guidance and push to help us view our own mental state with clearer lenses. Come and speak to us at our counselling centre in Thomson to enlighten yourself with new perspectives about your own behaviours and emotions, and empower yourself to manage your own mental health with renewed direction.